2011 has probably been both the best year of my life and the worst. 

I spent the most incredible summer I could have ever imagined with some great people, new people that I can now proudly call my friends. These guys really showed me that the world is much greater than what I’ve experienced here in Arcadia, and that there are better people out there in the world. Thanks to them, I guess there is no reason to lose faith in people—I just can’t give up.

Who’d have thought that despite this being senior year, I’d still meet new people or even meet “old” people again. I think one of my best moves was joining yearbook—I’ve never actually been apart of something so concrete before, and the people I’ve been working with have been, for the most part, incredible. The new friends I’ve made and old friendships which have made a comeback due to this book leaves me speechless. There were other groups I had wished to join, but I’ve come to terms with myself. There’s nothing I can do about it now, so why bother dwelling on it?

I think that I can safely say it is both the people I’ve met and grown closer to this year that have made this year so great, but at the same time it’s been friendships that have weakened or I’ve lost that has made some parts of 2011 so difficult. However I think I’ve finally thought it all through. Everyone has their own life under (some sort) of control. And if I just don’t fit into their puzzle at the moment, I think I’ll be fine with it. I guess for some friends I tried to hard to fit the wrong piece of the puzzle into the wrong spot, and that’s my mistake.

I’ve let other’s choices control my emotions and direction for way too long. I think it’s time I hold onto the reins of my own life again.

To the people who’ve stood by me this year, I think Selina Jen says it best

謝謝你們 愛我的每個人 在我的人生最像一場惡夢的旅程 陪我掙脫 勇敢地去醒來 當我的護衛 為我禱告心靈更強韌 謝謝你們 愛我的每個人 讓我努力後可以謝謝自己很坦誠 會想不通 或絕望到躲開 但你們做的 總讓我想堅強負責任 為了愛重生

But hey—the year’s over. I guess there’s no reason to spend time worrying about the past, especially when there’s such an adventure ahead of me. I think I’ve said way too many times that I’m ridiculously excited to leave Arcadia and venture out into something which is relatively unknown to me. At this point, it’s impossible to say where I’ll end up in the coming months, and where I’ll be flying back home from next winter break (I’m crossing my fingers that it’ll be D.C.). But no matter where I end up, I hope that it can be at least as equally amazing as the experience I had in Taiwan. Sure, I’m excited for new surroundings, new weather, new daily routines, but I definitely am the most excited for the new people I’m going to meet, the new friends I’m going to make. 

I regret so many things, I feel so bad for so many mistakes I’ve made, and I sometimes hate myself for not thinking things through earlier. But I’m really counting on for this path to end in June, and a new one to spring up. It’s a fresh start, a new beginning, and hell, I’m not going to waste any time worrying or carefully making every choice. It’s time to change things up.

To the future, Augustana’s Boston

I think I’ll go to Boston / I think I’ll start a new life, I think I’ll start it over, where no one knows my name / I’ll get out of California, I’m tired of the weather // Oh yeah and I think I’ll go to Boston, I think that I’m just tired / I think I need a new town, to leave this all behind / I think I need a sunrise, I’m tired of the sunset / I hear it’s nice in the summer, some snow would be nice /

This year could have totally gone better—but it only leaves room for a better year next year! And btw, I thought my title was really clever. And as of right now, looking into the next year, it seems like it’s going to be pretty damn great, and things are really looking up.

I’m writing this on Christmas, so it’s probably time to go eat lots! 

Cheers.